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1. Coffee Break Blues
2. He's an Old Nova Scotian
3. Little Blue Flame
4. Anna Marie
5. I'm A Cowboy Now
6. Dark Corners
7. What an Idiot He Is
8. You
9. She's Asleeping On the Couch
10. Have I Ever Told you Darning
11. Ash Hash

COFFEE BREAK BLUES

I want to take
a coffee break.
I've got to have a 
cup of Java.
Toke a mocha.
Columbian coffee bean.

Make it strong.
Make it hot.
Don't be long now.
Leave the pot.
I mean caffeine.
Columbian coffee bean.

If you're wondering do I like that stuff
well, yeah, I guess I drink it a bit.
Early in the morning and late at night.
As a matter of fact I think I'll have another hit.

A little cream would be a dream.
Come to that
I'll even drink it black.
I don't need no sugar, sugar,
but you could still stir it for me.

Fresh ground.
By the pound.
the only grind
that I don't mind.
I could get used to this liquid
if you give me half a chance.

I worked so hard this morning
but I've still got to go all afternoon.
Just about time for one more cup, now,
and don't you run away with that spoon.

Like Captain John told Lafayette
This stuff would go pretty good
with a cigarette."
Olé cafe.
Hey Brazil
I can't get my fill.

HE'S AN OLD NOVA SCOTIAN

He's an old Nova Scotian
far from the ocean
lost and alone on the street.

He looks like a lobster,
all boiled and red.
His coat is so greasy
his eyes are half-dead.

He doesn't remember
the last thing he said.
He's a derelict,
dead on his feet.

But that's no reason
to be sitting there teasing him,
laughing the way that you are.

You're a far sadder sight
in the deep of this night
in this cold, neon lit, coffee bar.

He comes to the counter
carrying his guitar
and he sits in the stool next to mine.

The boys at the tables
are yelling requests
but the old guy
doesn't pay them no mind.

Then he jumps up and shouts
"I come from the South Shore.
I left in the fifties 'cause
the living was poor

but I've spent all these years
walking up and down Bloor Street
living on handouts and wine."

Then he strums his guitar 
and he starts in to sing
but the words don't make sense
and he gets caught in the strings.

But what was by far
the sorriest thing
was the audience howling for more.



And the manager doesn't know 
what to do next
- he's been through this so many times.

He's asking him, please,
to put down the guitar
as the audience starts throwing dimes.

And the old man is standing there,
so out of place,
when he lays the guitar on the floor

and a beautiful smile
crosses his face
like he isn't there any more.

He pulls out a clipping
from a long time ago.
He says: "Here's my buddy,
his name is Hank Snow."

And some of the tables 
yell back: "Yeah, we know."
As the manager
shows him the door.

But all that's no reason
to be sitting there teasing him,
laughing the way that you are.

You're a far sadder sight
in the deep of this night
in this cold, neon lit coffee bar.

You're a far sadder sight
and the losers tonight
in this cold, neon lit coffee bar.

LITTLE BLUE FLAME

I write you a letter, telling you my desire
I put it in an envolope, and throw it in the fire.
Such a pretty kindling, thoughts I send to you
But you are not interested now even the flame is blue.

Ah, but I got a dish and I got a cup
And after I'm all through washing them up
Just for a change, I rearrange 'em.

Starring at the telephone, talking to the chair
Don't know what I'm doing, you no longer care.
When somebody come to the door, I gotta go wash my face.
I gotta mope the floor, there's tears all over the place

Found my boots in the fridge, they was a freezin'
Musta put 'em there for some good reason
Hard as I try, can't think why.

I listen to the radio, but I forget to turn it on
Not much on television, since you've been gone.
I try to read a book, but kinda loose the thread
Every word just reminds me of something we said.

Hey but other than that, I'm alright.
A little run down, a little uptight
A little too much, out of touch.

I figured I was hunger, so I made myself a mean
But it's only sitting there, starting to conjeal.
I figured I was tired, and so I went to bed
Not much chance of sleeping with this battle going on in my head.

So I walk the floor all night long
Talking to myself and I wrote this song,
Now I can make it rhyme, if I try.
Well I walk the floor all night long
Talking to myself and I wrote this song,
Now I can make it rhyme, if I try to.

ANNA MARIE

Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.

We met across a crowded table somewhere.
I couldn't say a word there.
I tried so hard not to stare.
I thought I saw you maybe give me the eye.
I wondered who was the guy sitting beside you?

Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.

I asked a friend of mine if you were alone.
She said she didn't know
but she thought so.
She gave me your number and I gave you a call
but all I got back was your answer machine.

Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.

We met a few days later out in the street.
You seemed happy to meet.
We went and had something to eat.
We talked a bit about the things that we like.
You told me horses and your new mountain bike.

Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.

A band of street musicians started to play.
The air came alive in the outdoor cafe.
The waitress smiled as she balanced her tray 
and did a little dance all the way down the aisle.

Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.

For the rest of the day we wandered the town
where the bag lady lies, where the bus turns around
where the car radios with the windows rolled down
play a Beatles’ song that makes me think of you.

Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.

Well the money comes in but it's so hard to hold.
If you've got it you're hot, if you haven't you're cold.
The Royal Tower may be made out of gold
but all I see in it is Anna Marie.
.

Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.

Where you may be now I have no way to know.
You don't say anything, you just pick up and go.
There's an ache in your heart babe and it's hurting you so
but I know you're the first to laugh about it all.

Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.  Anna Marie.
La la la la la la la la.

I'M A COWBOY NOW

I was born in the suburbs.
I've never seen a cow.
I bought myself a hat
and I'm a cowboy now.

Yes I'm a cowboy now.
I'm a cowboy now.
Yippie-i-ki-yay
But don't get in my way
'cause I'm a cowboy now.

I feel so proud
and I walk so tall
in my new jean jacket
and my overalls.

I'm a cowboy now.
Yes I'm a cowboy now.
Well I used to be confused 
‘till I bought some cowboy shoes
but I'm a cowboy now.

I don't want to be a business man.
I don't want to be a movie star.
It's so good when you know who you are.

And I'm a cowboy now.
Yes I'm a cowboy now.
Well I don't want to sound too tough
but I've taken this rough stuff long enough.
I'm a cowboy now.

Yes I am.  Hey hey mama. Woo Hoo!

DARK CORNERS

Going in was sunny, milk and honey,
the sky was blue and the leaves were green.
We were a couple of flirts,
We were in like dirty shirts
but the getting out was not too clean.
I guess I'll never know what it is I missed
and what I'll never understand
is why you had to give the knife a twist.

Now, I realize I'm no prize,
at least not one anyone cares to claim.
But I've got no regrets, what you see is what you get.
Honey can you say the same?
You've got a different face for every day of the week.
You're a schemin' chameleon siren demon
schizophrenic photogenic freak.

Well you're a litterbug at best,
you leave behind a mess
and you're a fool if you think nobody sees.
And at the worst you're a murderer in the first
even if nothing in the law agrees.
You tell me you don't love nobody better than you.
Well you told me a lot of things,
I don't think that one's any more true.

I'm burned, I got nothing in return.
All you ever learned to do is take.
You're not on the level,
you're a trickster, you're a devil,
you're a pasty, tasty little piece of cake.
I've seen the soft side of you, what'd that prove?
You've got a heart you could skate on.
You've got a permanent hate on for everything that moves.

I'm thin-skinned, still getting back my wind
but I'll be back again someday.
I know I'm only one of many
but I'm the original bad penny, honey,
and when I owe I pay.
Part of me says live and learn, learn to turn the other cheek,
but I've got this knee-jerk reaction demanding satisfaction,
And it's wicked now, with a self destructive streak.
.



Well I don't know what I will do
before this whole thing is through
but whatever it is I'll be seeing you around.
I've been following you long enough
down the corridors of your mind
to know where it is you like to hang around.
You’re hanging around those dark corners honey.
You'd better watch out hanging around those dark corners babe.

WHAT AN IDIOT HE IS

He walks with a swagger
And he talks with a sneer
And everything about him
tell you don't come near
He doesn't bother lookin'
To the left or to the right
He knows where he is goin'
And he keeps it in sight
And he can never figure out
Why he is so uptight
What an idiot he is.

He knows that it's a jungle 
And he thinks he's Jungle Jim
I know I'm gonna get away
With nothing' with him
He hasn't got a principal
He hasn't got a clue
And he hasn't got a doubt
About what you gotta do
You gotta get the other guy 
Before he gets you.

He's always gotta make
A big impression on you
He gotta show you what he has
And tell you what he can do
And all the while he's gotta try
To cut you down to size
Try and hide the simple truth
With his elaborate lies
One thing he can never do
Is look you in the eye
What an idiot he is.

.
He hasn't bothered thinkin'
Since he was ten
He'll tell you he already knew
What he had to know by then
Any one who disagrees with him
Should be in prison
All he wants is what is his
Even if it isn't
You can talk until you're blue
But you'll never make him listen
To what an idiot he is.

He thinks his only problem 
Is he ain't got more
He wants to get so rich
Might even buy the whole damn store
Well I guess he know the value
Of his heard earned buck
If you try to bum some money 
You will have no luck
But he'll spend a couple hundred
On a decal for his truck
No problem.

He's always got the latest 
Girlie magazines
He knows what every dirty word
In the dictionary means
(He looked 'em up)
He's always got a snicker
When the girls go by
He thinks that every one of them
Is given' him the eye
Because he dress so sharp
And he's such a cool guy
What an idiot he is.

.
The only thing he cares about 
Is what's it gonna cost
And the only shame he knows
Is that the home team lost
(You see the game?)
He got an easy boy recliner 
And a colour TV
And a Colt 45
Hidden underneath the seat
And he can hardly wait
To shoot somebody in the knee
What an idiot he is.

He doesn't even know 
What an idiot he is
He says "What's an idy idy?"
Lord have pity
His favorite food is
Wonder Bread and Cheez Whiz
He's a one percent attention
And ninety-nine show
And he always got an answer 
Even if he doesn't know
And if you tell him where it's at
He will tell you where to go
What an idiot he is.

Well I see him everywhere I go
And he gives me a pain
When I'm sitting in the movies
He will rattle cellophane
He's always got a dumb expression 
on his face
He makes me feel sorry
For the Human race
'Cause I got a funny feelin'
That he's runnin' the place.

YOU

You.  You make me feel so good.
You make me feel like a kid
the way I did
before I knew about the war between the sexes.
The subject of this exercise is you.
I've only known you for a day or two
but time doesn't seem to have a lot to do
with how I feel about you.

You've got me smiling in the morning when I'm opening my bills.
I'm thinking about putting flower boxes in my window sills.
I said you, you're doing something to me.

You 
were standing there beside me in a room
when I became aware of your perfume
and I made so bold as to speak my mind 
expecting to be scolded.
But you
were kind enough to laugh about my joke
I bummed a smoke
to hide the way I felt
'cause I was ready to melt.

Like a lump of butter on a hot corn cob
I'm even thinking about going out and looking for a job.
I said you, you're doing something to me.

Now I
I walk around the block
and I find myself somewhere halfway across the city.
And I
I sit down to write a song
and I come up with this hopeless little ditty.
But I pity anyone
who's only ever won
a bunch of money in a lottery.
I said you, you're doing something to me.

And I
I've only got one number in my book
and I don't even have to look
I know that number off by heart.
I start to dial
but then I wait awhile
'cause I am so afraid that you will change your mind
but then I find
that what is really terrifying me
is the thought that you may not. 




You've got me polishing the furniture and washing the car.
My friends say give the little lady a big cigar.
I said you, you're doing something to me.
You, you're doing something to me.

SHE'S ASLEEPING ON THE COUCH

Well I forgot my key and I pounding on the window
Does she hear, does she care, does she even know I'm there.
I'm all locked out and I wanna get in, 
Now I can see you there beside me just asleeping on the couch
She's asleeping on the couch
She's just asleeping on the couch
She even got the television blasting all the while
She's asleeping on the couch
Well a cat walks in the room and he's looking kinda funny at me
He don't like the way I'm pounding on the door
A Bang Bang Bang now whyever can't you hear me honey
I'm so close beside you I can even hear you snore,
But you're just sleeping on the couch
You're just asleeping on the couch
That must be quite a dream if you can't even hear me screm
You're just sleeping on the couch
Well you try sleeping through this now.

Well it looks so warm inside and I'm feeling kinda chilly
I don't wanna spend the whole night
Standing out here in the cold
Neighbours passing my make me feel so silly 
If they think we've been fighting and they gotta get told
She's just asleeping on the couch
She's just asleeping on the couch
But short of breaking windows I don't know what I can do
You're just sleeping on the couch now
Come on, wake up, baby
Hey, come on now, it's time to go to bed.
Oh no.

HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU DARLING

When I tell you that I love you
And I look into your eyes
You look back with such affection
It always takes me by surprise
Whenever I kiss you
I feel your lips reach out for mine

You're a part of me
I know that it can be a full time job 
For you to love me sometimes

At first I ever saw you
I was drivin by desire
I started up a conversation
I was nothing but alive
You were such a willing victim
As you told me later on
Such a little schemer
I'll bet you didn't know you were tangling with a dreamer

Have I ever told you darling
I was lost before you came
Full of defenses
But now I gotta break 'em down and start mending fences oh yea
We survived the honeymoon
And settled down to play
And all our friends were taking bets
On how long we would stay
We're about as different as is possible to be.
But they never heard us
Whispering in the early hours of the morning, oh no

You're my greatest critic
You're my most supporting fan
There is nothing we can say
In attemps to understand
Even pain pours between us
Are because they must be said
Part of the mystery
But I love you babe, and all the rest is history, oh yea.

Have I ever told you darling
How you opened up my heart
It took some deciding
But we're building something
That I take a lot of pride in

Have I ever told you darling
How you opened up my heart.


ASH HASH

Now if all this ash
used to be hash
what the heck time is it now?
Last thing I remember
I was looking at my stash
Just before the late late show.
Then we threw a couple of movies in the VCR
and I remember driving buddy home in the car.
Well I got no gas so we couldn't have gone far.
What the heck time is it now?

Oh my weary and aching head.
Come on, I've got to get some thinking done.
I can't remember where I put the bed.
Well I ain't moved it since '71.
I got a real sneaky feeling I'm about to fall down.
I hope I can find my way to the ground.
I'd hate to spend the whole night afloatin’ around
in the condition I'm in.
Awww.

You know what I think I better do?

First thing in the morning
I'm giving myself a break.
You kind of get a warning
when your fingernails and eyelids ache.
Well it might be closer to the afternoon
but the big point is I'm gonna do it soon.
There ain't nothing underneath this moon 
will ever make me toke another take
Uhn-uh.

Y'know I'm feeling better just thinking
about how much better I'm gonna feel.

Hey, what's that on the table?
Why it looks like a little chunk.
I bet old Petey dropped that there;
he always was a drunk.
Well it looks so good just sitting there.
I believe what I need is a bite of the hair.
Doggone stuff is like a breath of fresh air.
I think I'm gonna sell the farm - buy more.
I think I'm gonna sell the farm - I'll find the door
and then I think I'm gonna sell the farm.

WORDS AND MUSIC BY BOB SNIDER
(c) peermusic CANADA INC./CHATTERBOX MUSIC